I’ve been making an insanely huge number of mistakes and bad decisions lately. Daily, hourly, minutely I am messing up. Sometimes the mistakes are big and bad, sometimes they are inconsequential to the world, something that only I notice.
I am not trying to make mistakes, which would just be counterproductive to growth. In fact, I am doing my best to not make mistakes by learning from past errors, listening to the wisdom of older people, and learning from the mistakes of others. But despite my best efforts I am still screwing up a lot. However, instead of using these mistakes as a barrier, I am using them as a spring board.
This Thought is my way of publicly announcing that I messed up and am now attempting to repair my mistakes.
In my recent growth experiences I have been selfish and inconsiderate to the extent of offending quite a few individuals. Through my effort to dig deep inside myself, I had to go through some phases of exploring different traits and personalities, some of which were not conducive to honoring others feelings. I am glad that I followed my ideas and acted how I thought best, but there are a few situations that I could have handled better.
This is my “Oops, I messed up.”
Correcting My Mistakes
Being Less Selfish
I have been very selfish lately and from my view it is completely justified. For a lot of reasons I need to be all about me right now. But I have taken it too far and it is time to swing to the other side of the spectrum. I am now going out of my way to be unselfish. Some ways I have been doing this include considering how my action affect others, tipping more regardless of service (an idea from Ikigai), and going out of my way to help and contribute to others.
In my mass “Un-Friending” I
probably cut ties with people that I shouldn’t have. In the heat of the moment, to keep a friend or un-friend, most of the time I chose to un-friend. Not saying that’s right or wrong but I made a choice and went with it. In the Thought I said, “It’s easier to rebuild from scratch than to fix something with major foundational flaws.” Time to make that happen. I will be personally messaging people in order to re-establish a connection and hopefully start rebuilding the bridge of friendship.
Evening Out my Arrogance
Lately, I have been arrogant, controversial, challenging, aggressive, and dominant. I have a “take over the world” view of what I can do right now. And although it’s been really fun and has allowed me to think differently, I have taken it a little too far. So I am conceding my 0ver-aggressiveness and taking some steps back. So as of now:
I’m putting myself in my place by going back to apologize for mistakes, for specific actions, and for being (insert synonym for cocky).